Tuesday, January 20, 2009

The Next Chapter

Its been so long since I was last here that I feel like a stranger in a strange land. Life is moving with incredible acceleration. In some ways I feel as though I've dropped through the rabbit hole, picking up speed as I went. Suddenly - poof! I have landed with a thud in an entirely new place in my life.

I'm not in the habit of making resolutions at New Year. This year was no different, although I found myself pausing to take stock of my life up to this point. It seemed even more potent for me as this January 1st marked not only a new year, but also my 40th birthday. It is with great pleasure that I feel as though I've stepped across a chasm. Many times I felt as though I was moving too slowly. I was hungry for more and more experiences. I often felt "stuck" and yet as I sit to write, I can see that my evolution as a person has been anything but slow and steady - its been with quantum leaps followed by periods of adjustment before once again jumping off.

My thirties seemed to have been devoted to discovery of self. I was so practiced at doing what was right and expected that I lost sight of myself, only to powerfully re-discover who I am and all the possibility that resides within. I set up and then sold off businesses, I hit the "re-set" button on how I interact with my family - choosing meaning over duty. I discovered so much about health and well-being in an entirely different context - one that literally reconfigured everything about how I see the world now. I worked formally and informally with hundreds of people as they reclaimed their lives and their health. I gave birth to 3 sons and have since been on an incredible journey as a mother to children who are entering a world that is at a momentous bifurcation point. My physical circumstances are unrecognizable compared to 10 years ago and are beyond my humble dreams back then.

Yes, upon reflection, the past 10 years have been truly potent. My acceleration is completely connected to my willingness to step into my first WEL-Systems program where the conversations I craved were available and where new insights emerged, not as a product of my intellect, but from the very core of my being. The best part was that they were MY insights, MY truth - not one installed by someone else. I was taught to breathe and to pay attention to what was going on inside me - and the rest was purely magical.

Having crossed a significant chasm, I now stand here looking forward. I'm about to embark on a very significant new chapter. This time I know who I am. Although I have no idea where I am going, I'm guided choice by choice into a new terrain. My return to blogging has as much to do with discovery in the moment as it has to do with leaving behind evidence of my journey, because although I don't know where I'm headed, I'm quite certain that I'll be moving with great speed and intensity!

1 comment:

Unknown said...

welcome back, always look forward to reading YOUR words!! :) hugs