Still Life and Chicken Pox

It is now officially the seventh day since my son came home from school with chicken pox. In fact, exactly half of his class were similarly affected. Makes you wonder about what goes on in a collective of 5 year old that creates this. What I mean is what is it that lies below the generally accepted medical concepts of virulence and contagion? What link between mind and body exists that leads to the physical expression of chicken pox? Considered through the CODE Model(TM), chicken pox invite questions about fire, water and our connection to self and others. How interesting that it would have such a mass expression in children at an age coming to an awareness of who the world tells them they are.

One thing I know for sure is that this event has been a gift of spending extra time with my growing son. I've already noticed that he resists and refuses hugs and kisses while on school property .... and in general come to think of it! This hasn't been the case over the past week where hugs and kisses are a regular part of the day.

In the midst of upside down days and nights, where baths at 3 am are just as likely as baths at 3 pm and sleep comes in short snatches between Benedryl doses, I can feel a stillness in our family life. We are focused and pulling together. We appreciate laughs and go out of our way to be together doing simple things.

Patience seems to have expanded in the wake of the past few days. Case in point- I have been watching the same 30 minute recording of the Backyardigans for most of the day so far and I haven't yet pulled out any of my hair. I suppose I have reached a zen-like state in the midst of fatigue and my son's obvious contentment now that he is feeling better.

Gratitude is like that - it sneaks up on you and smacks you over the head. A week ago I would have been coming out of my skin with the boredom of repetition and would have held to our usual rule of no TV except between 7 and 8 pm. Spending a week with a child alternately listless and in a frenzy of maddening scratching has allowed me to see this with grateful eyes. Stillness where irritation would have once ruled.

I read Lori's blog posting from Friday Feb. 9th with interest. I, too struggle with many of the questions she asks. Yes, its a holographic universe and I am at the centre of my creations so how is it that I seem to be unable to create health for those around me? What is it in me that has invited the agonizing experience of watching my child in those moments of inconsolable discomfort?

I am willing to concede to all the medical help available to make him more comfortable, recognizing that there is a continuum between a therapy model of the world and an autopoietic one. And, I recognize that I can choose my responses from many positions along this continuum. Benedryl and breathing, Advil and Quantum TLC... not an either/or type of choice.

Seeing this time as a gift and an opportunity to connect to my son in new ways has provided me with a new perspective on gratitude and insight into who he is becoming. As usual, the more I relax into the process, the easier it becomes for both of us. Hologram, indeed. Now if only I could get the Backyardigans off my holodeck for a few minutes! Just kidding - I'm grateful:)