Mother Lode

After some thought and consideration, I've decided to rename and reinvent my blog. That's the beauty of the Internet today! With just a few clicks, voila! - there I am, reinvented in a way that more closely reflects who I have become. I noticed how resistant I was to adopting a new blog identity and appearance and yet every time I logged on, I would feel a niggle that this venue didn't seem to represent me very well anymore. It really made me think of the many other places and identities that I continue to inhabit that really aren't a good fit anymore. I also realized just how quickly and easily change can come about once I embrace it.

This week I made a profound realization that was like falling asleep on a bus and waking up after arriving at a destination. I have arrived at a place in my life where my old profession, my past business life and my burning desire to be a writer have all been eclipsed by my priority to be a mother to Baby S and Medium R. I used to believe that being a stay at home Mom would never offer me the stimulation and intensity that I craved. Instead, I'm discovering how all the pieces of me fit into this new framework. Becoming clear and then getting honest with myself has really helped me to re-engineer my self-perception in a way that feels much more in alignment with who I am right now. Just like this blog, that person keeps changing and evolving too!

I've edited out a few more things, old and redundant links that don't fit - in both my blog and my identity. In the process, I've discovered more space for the things that matter most. I will certainly continue to write. Its too big a part of me to ever go away! I'm taking time to notice the riches within the life I currently lead and that's what I'm choosing to focus on. My life is rarely glamorous or calm. Some days getting dressed and getting the dishwasher emptied is a huge accomplishment! Its a far cry from my former life as a professional and a business owner and yet it feels right - at least for now. Who knows what lies ahead!

I hope I won't scare away those who are not yet parents or who have made a choice to not have children or who are struggling to conceive. I have lived through all those stages myself and although children and motherhood are the inspiration for what I write these days, it always comes back to mining for meaning in my life and my own quest to grow and evolve as a person. It just so happens that my life experiences are my creative catalysts! And as always, I write for me and to make sense of my life - if that resonates with others from time to time then that just makes it sweeter! Like with any other big change, there will be those who will move on and others who will decide to join in. I need to remember to stay true to me rather than trying to hold on to the pieces that are ready to fall away. A fabulous life lesson I seem to create over and over again for myself.

So welcome to Mother Lode! A place where I plan to mine the abundant riches that life has to offer me - especially when they are diamonds in the rough!!